Saturday, July 31, 2004
Surprise! - it's twins!
I ran into my neighbour tonight and noticed for the first time that she is pregnant. I spoke to her a week or two ago and thought she might have put on a bit of weight... but tonight, she was very definitely pregnant - so I mentioned the fact.
"Oh didn't I tell you," she said "I'm 40 and pregnant with twins."
Somewhat nonplussed, I begged her pardon and she replied: "I'm 40 years old and I'm going to have 3 children under 2!"... this said while trying to grab the hand of her active, red-haired 14 month old son.
She tells me she was married once and it was discovered that she could not become pregnant; even went through IVF. The 'fault' was supposed to be in her reproductive system, not the husband's.
That marriage broke up and she got together with the current boyfriend, although the relationship was neither full-time, nor exclusive and went through quite a few rocky patches. They lived together for a while and he moved out but they still saw each other and one day, she found herself pregnant. Deciding "I can do this" she told him she didn't want him to move back in and didn't want any support but he was welcome to have as much or as little relationship with the child as he wanted. He already had two grown up children from a previous marriage. "It seemed a miracle, that I was actually pregnant," she said.
Since the child has been born, Dad's become more and more involved but still had his separate home and separate life (he works offshore so is away working for three weeks out of five). Then my neighbour found that, not only was one miracle baby possible, but it seemed a second might not be out of the question.
What she wasn't anticipating when she went for a routine 12 week scan, was that this second baby, coming so soon and so unexpectedly after the first, could turn out to be not one baby but two!
And that's how my 40 year old, totally and hopelessly infertile neighbour will end up having 3 children under the age of 2!
Footnote: Dad's decided they just have to pull together on this and has moved back in. They are going to live together for at least the first year and move interstate to be closer to her mum and get some domestic help a couple of days a week when Dad's away on the job.
They've been able to make mature and realistic plans in the midst of what must have been an incredible shock and disruption to the way they saw their lives progressing. I admire them both and will be sorry to lose them as neighbours.
...and the moral of this story is: never trust a medical diagnosis - maybe God has other plans!
"Oh didn't I tell you," she said "I'm 40 and pregnant with twins."
Somewhat nonplussed, I begged her pardon and she replied: "I'm 40 years old and I'm going to have 3 children under 2!"... this said while trying to grab the hand of her active, red-haired 14 month old son.
She tells me she was married once and it was discovered that she could not become pregnant; even went through IVF. The 'fault' was supposed to be in her reproductive system, not the husband's.
That marriage broke up and she got together with the current boyfriend, although the relationship was neither full-time, nor exclusive and went through quite a few rocky patches. They lived together for a while and he moved out but they still saw each other and one day, she found herself pregnant. Deciding "I can do this" she told him she didn't want him to move back in and didn't want any support but he was welcome to have as much or as little relationship with the child as he wanted. He already had two grown up children from a previous marriage. "It seemed a miracle, that I was actually pregnant," she said.
Since the child has been born, Dad's become more and more involved but still had his separate home and separate life (he works offshore so is away working for three weeks out of five). Then my neighbour found that, not only was one miracle baby possible, but it seemed a second might not be out of the question.
What she wasn't anticipating when she went for a routine 12 week scan, was that this second baby, coming so soon and so unexpectedly after the first, could turn out to be not one baby but two!
And that's how my 40 year old, totally and hopelessly infertile neighbour will end up having 3 children under the age of 2!
Footnote: Dad's decided they just have to pull together on this and has moved back in. They are going to live together for at least the first year and move interstate to be closer to her mum and get some domestic help a couple of days a week when Dad's away on the job.
They've been able to make mature and realistic plans in the midst of what must have been an incredible shock and disruption to the way they saw their lives progressing. I admire them both and will be sorry to lose them as neighbours.
...and the moral of this story is: never trust a medical diagnosis - maybe God has other plans!
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